[Degsy]

Originally Posted by 97BladeRider

And Deval wants to get rid of sex ed in schools.

I guess it'll be more up the parents now.

I definitely know about this subject, since my older sister had a child a week past her 16th b-day. The father wanted nothing to do with my niece and my parents took her in as a daughter.

My sister didn't have much of a hand in raising her and it took its toll.

Wow, same story in my house. That's why I have a brother who is 27 years younger than me.


derek

[KillBill]

Originally Posted by wylee

Are you saying you really think a class that teaches abstinence only is more helpful then one that teaches the risks and how to minimize the risks?

Not at all. I am merely suggesting that things that are in place are being removed while we still have a severe problem that is affecting not only young people but tax paying citizens. I am sure that the program could be tweaked.

[richw]

DE-EVOLUTION

"you must whip it"

[JeffL]

I have absolutely no faith in the intelligence of the general public anymore. Not that I ever really did.

[Dianne]

She has decided to give the baby up for adoption. She knows that it is what is best for the baby and what is best for her as well. She has her whole life ahead of her to try to make something out of herself and I know that the baby will be blessed by a loving family that would be more than happy to take her.

My sister asked me to help her find the perfect family for the baby and I have been in contact with a few folks through email and telephone. It was amazing how quickly there were responses. Its just a reassurance that someone out there will give this baby a loving and deserving home.

I am not blaming this whole thing on my mother. At least I am not trying to. Perhaps I am trying to shelter my sister from any wrong in this when I know that she is to blame as well but she's still a baby herself and I just wish that this could have been prevented with a combination of common sense on her part, guidance on my mother's part and so forth.

My sister has absolutely learned so much from this and grown up quite a bit. I am hoping that this changes her line of thinking on a lot of things.

Right now we are just trying to focus on her taking care of herself and the baby so it will be healthy and finding the right family to adopt the baby.

As for the father, as it was stated above, its either some kid her age that would be useless in helping raise the baby (since he is not helping her now and has pretty much disappeared from the picture) or some asshole that deserves to be in jail. My sister is not telling me much about the baby's father just yet, hoping that she will soon. I know that he has to sign off on the adoption, or she has to post something in the newspaper stating that she is to give birth to a baby that she will be giving up for adoption and if the father wants any rights to object, he needs to step forward and call the attorney, etc.

After that, I am hoping that somehow my sister might be able to get out of that household she is in and make something of herself in the long run, stay in school, graduate, etc.

[Degsy]

Well, it sounds like you are the voice of reason and you are steering her clear of trouble.

Good luck with everything.

[Dianne]

There are a few families that we have been in contact with that are very promising, one in particular that are totally cool with an open adoption where pictures, etc. are sent. This was something that was very important for my sister and we were having trouble finding a family that seemed right and was willing to have things open.

They are great people and really seem to understand what she is going through right now, already have one adopted son that is about 2 years old so my lil niece would have a big brother (every girl needs one of those).

She hasnt made her final decision yet but it looks like she is very close and she is feeling better about the whole thing knowing she has made the right choices.

[richw]

Great...
There is a lot of predators attorneys etc in the soup so be careful.

Both my boys came from CT DCF #2 was 2 days old.

PLUS PLUS I get a stipend from the state and free medical...cool. Also right now they are guaranteed admition to a state college when of age.
That's shakey but the rest is solid

Its almost 2 late but stay on the prenatal care vitamins etc if she's a user try to stop her so the baby doesn't have to detox

[MissTwisties]

That's very sad. So young... but at least seems that she is seeing some light at the end of the tunnel, that's good. Good luck finding the perfect family for the baby.

Let me ask you, do you have to check criminal background and all that stuff before choosing the one family that will adopt the baby? Are you going thru an adoption agency?

[Dianne]

Originally Posted by MissTwisties

That's very sad. So young... but at least seems that she is seeing some light at the end of the tunnel, that's good. Good luck finding the perfect family for the baby.

Let me ask you, do you have to check criminal background and all that stuff before choosing the one family that will adopt the baby? Are you going thru an adoption agency?

We are going through an angency where each family is pre-screened, so its one less thing to worry about. Theres enough stress involved with this whole thing. The family that it looks like the baby is going to already has one adopted child and come highly recommended from that childs birth parents. My sister is almost 100% with going with this family. we both have a great feeling about them so things are looking up.

[richw]

Sounds good

MY litmus test would be if they dropped coin and effort in fertility stuff. If you went through that horror ride and still were together and trying then its a solid situation

Lets hope this is a slap that focuses the sister into trying to do better.

Good luck and God bless

[ticket2ride]

yikes.. glad to hear that she decided to be responsible as possible for this irresponsible decision of hers.. I hope that the adoption goes well for the little girl and that there are no problems in the pregnancy.

This year, seriously is like baby year. Everyone seems to be pregnant or havin a child. It's scarey.. Most my friends are in their mid to upper twenties.. but some are my age .aka 21.. and think that having a child is great.

Um hello! What is wrong with these people? no job stability or a stable life, no health insurance, no career? how is this responsible to have a child!? People these days just don't think ahead/in advance... and think that having a child is like a pet. God knows it's not. So many people have "baby fever" and are all about it.. til it happens and their lives and the future childs life will be ruined after. Perhaps it's time to think ahead and have a reality check for the world.

Be responsible. Apparently that's too much to ask for these days.

[rebelpacket]

Our society is engraining into our kids that "Its alright, its someone else's fault, and someone will help you take care of it". Its not a recipe for responsible children OR adults.

[beet]

No ones responsible!! We get lawyers & get off look @ the news.
It's a fucking shame.

Originally Posted by rebelpacket

Our society is engraining into our kids that "Its alright, its someone else's fault, and someone will help you take care of it". Its not a recipe for responsible children OR adults.

[ticket2ride]

it's pathetic , that's what it is.. and it really is just disgusting.

I swear, people should have a license to have children.. and i've been saying this for ages now..

[Adrenalinechic]

Dianne, glad to hear she is making one responsible choice in her life. People make mistakes, but I couldn't imagine having sex at 14. I waited until I was 16 and now wish I waited even longer...

I couldn't imagine having a child right now, and I'm 22. When I look at my parents, my mother had 3 children by the time she was 25, and my father 28.

I've worked in maternity units and you will see young young GIRLS pregnant for the 5-6th time (not necessarily have 5-6 kids). Granted, the majority are hispanic and believe birth control is wrong, but abortions are ok... (don't get me started on this!). If I found out my 14 yr old was having sex 1. she'd get an IUD (can't get pregnant for 5 or 10 yrs), and then strip her of everything she owns and show her how life would be as a teenage mother- same for a son. My 'rents did alright as teenagers, but times are changin' now and it's just not as acceptible to be having children when you haven't gotten your high school diploma yet.

Let us know how things turn out and best of luck!

[MissTwisties]

Originally Posted by Adrenalinechic

. Granted, the majority are hispanic and believe birth control is wrong, but abortions are ok... (don't get me started on this!).

That right there is fucked up. I'm not gonna debate wether abortion is right or wrong. But for some people to believe that abortion is better than birth control makes me cringe big time. Go downtown Springfield, the whole Main street for exemple, you see them young mothers dragging 2-3-4-5 kids, they can barely feed and clothe them. That is, when the mom is actually with her kids, because I think I have seen more toddlers/young children left alone to play on sidewalks with no supervision whatsoever (no adult around) They probably hope someone will kidnap their kid so they don't have to take care of them anymore. Some women should have their uterus removed!

On the other hand...you have these otherwise good teenager girls, who their parents might never have taken the time to sit and have a good talk with them about "life"...the girl might be rather ignorant/innocent and then she makes the mistake of having sex with that "nice boyfriend" who's gonna love her forever...you know the rest.

[SSearchVT]

Originally Posted by ticket2ride

This year, seriously is like baby year. Everyone seems to be pregnant or havin a child. It's scarey.. Most my friends are in their mid to upper twenties.. but some are my age .aka 21.. and think that having a child is great.

You're in that age group. A few years ago it probably seemed like everyone was getting married. In my mid to late 20's I must have gone to 25 weddings.

But, unfortunately most people have no idea the responsibility, time, sacrafice, and commitment that kids need. They see them as cute babies (kind of like getting a puppy)... Stay home from work for 8 weeks on maternity leave, and then go back to work - someone else will take care of the baby during the day...

This is a different situation... She's 14 and making stupid choices (and hanging out with guys with one thing on their mind - and it isn't responsibility and love). After the baby is delivered and everyone is healthy again - get her on birth control. The shot preferably (3 months, no missed days). Hopefully this will be the 2x4 across the head that shows consequences for actions. A good long talk about STD's should take place too.

[rebelpacket]

I was pretty sure I didn't want kids, but when I got a dog it confirmed it. Their a lot of work. Kids would be quadruple that. I'm all set. Thankfully, the number of people that realize they don't want kids before they have them is rising slowly. It needs to, to offset the number of people that make the mistakes.

P.S. Its kinda bullshit that the women have to do all the birth control stuff. Guys, get your shit together before you get VD and a child support payment.

[ticket2ride]

not to mention the amount of psycho gold digger girls out there.. I always warn my guy friends to watch it.. b/c I've met my fair share of psycho girls who think it's "smart" to find a rich man etc and get impregnated by them so they can get all that money. MORONS.

Horses & dogs are fine with me.. really.

As for the people who think abortion is better than the pill.. perhaps they should try having an abortion first then MAYBE, just maybe they'll realize how horrendous it is to go through.. whether it's the medically induced abortion or the other procedure which is even worse.. both are crappy..

People need to take responsibilty of their actions and actually own their actions.

what a concept huh?

[ftrain]

I want to have kids. lots and lots of kids. Now if I could only find a wife.

[ticket2ride]

LOL there's many out there that love popping out children.. that won't be difficult to find if that's the only thing you're lookin for LOL but i'm sure that's not.. and you want more than a baby making machine

[richw]

NORPLANT

Then movies about dieing from AIDS

Make her listen to

Paradise by the dashboard lights

until she can recite it and understand it.

The boy really is in love until...squirt...

[rebelpacket]

Guys who don't want kids... NSV's are cheap, and compared to traditional procedures, pretty painless.. If you don't want 'em, don't chance it.

[ChrisNoF4i]

Originally Posted by ticket2ride

not to mention the amount of psycho gold digger girls out there... Horses & dogs are fine with me... really.

whaaaaat?