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*** NOTICE ***
Since the Taliban and many Al Quaida cannot stand nudity, and consider it a sin to see a naked woman that is not their wife, this Sunday afternoon at 2:00 PM Eastern time, all North American women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.
All men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their house, to prove that they think it's okay to see other women nude. And since the Taliban also does not approve of alcohol, a cold six-pack at your side is further proof of your anti-Taliban sentiment.
The United States of America appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists, and applauds your participation. Come on guys, get out there and support the gals as they root out the terrorists hiding in YOUR neighborhood!!
God Bless America!
Sincerely,
HOMELAND SECURITY
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