This guy's walking home from work, really late, in the pitch black of night. There isn't another soul on the street. Suddenly, from out of the gloom, comes an ominous bump...bump...bump. He looks behind him and spots a furtive, shadowy thing coming down the street after him. Unnerved, he picks up his pace, finally breaking into a panicked run. He looks behind him again, and the shadow is closer. Bump...bump...bump. The glow of a streetlight illuminates the shadow momentarily, and, to the man's horror, it is a coffin, bumping down the sidewalk. He quickens his pace, running as fast as he can go, but the coffin only pursues more quickly. BUMP...BUMP...BUMP! He reaches his house, fumbles frantically for his keys, and slips in the door just as the coffin reaches his front steps. He slams the door and leans against it, catching his breath. Bump...bump...bump. There is a moment's silence, and the man wonders if he dares to breathe. Suddenly.... Bump...bump...bump...Bump...BUMP! BUMP! BUMPBUMPBUMPCRAAAAASH!!!! He rebounds away as the door breaks off its hinges. Scrambling to his feet, he charges up the stairs, and the coffin races after. BUMP BUMP BUMP BUMP! Terrified, he backs into a corner and starts throwing everything within reach at the coffin -- a handful of papers, a vase, a box of crackers, a lamp -- but the coffin keeps coming! BUMP BUMP BUMP BUMP BUMP INCHESFROMHISFACE, and nothing seems to slow it down! His hands fall upon a bottle of cough syrup, and he throws that at the coffin, too!
The coffin stops.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why do ducks have big flat feet?
To stamp out forest fires.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why do elephants have big flat feet?
To stamp out flaming ducks.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Have you seen the new Barbie Doctor doll?
You wind her up, and she operates on batteries.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Three elephants fell off a cliff. Two fell on land. One fell in the water.
Boom-boom-chhh!
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
What do you call the hair of a centaur?
Humane.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
A club sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve food here."
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
How do you catch a rabbit?
Hide in a meadow and make carrot noises.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why did the commuter want the carpool driver to take the bridge?
To avoid car-pool tunnel!
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Energizer Bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why did the farmer make a high-pitched gasp?
Because he was tired of the sigh-low.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
trying to catch up in the post count i see.
Brent LRRS #772
2006 KTM 560 SMR
Why did the barber win the race?
He knew a short cut.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why didn't the little girl want to leave nursery school?
She wanted to be a nurse.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
what's sauce for the goose...Originally posted by oreo_n2
trying to catch up in the post count i see.
bitch.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
When is a school paper not a school paper?
When it's turned into the teacher
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
What's Mary short for?
She's got no legs.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school?
Everyone kept saying it was back to school time.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?
If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
what do you call a cow with no legs?
ground beef.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
what do you call a dog with no legs?
anything you want... it still won't come to you.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
In Washington D.C., helicopters are often used to monitor the traffic conditions. Frequently jammed is the Francis Scott Key bridge, named after the man who wrote the national anthem. The bridge's traffic problem is notorious; among some, it's known as the Car Strangled Spanner.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
Where did Napoleon keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple.
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