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Armageddon Bikes

  1. #1
    Lifer Garandman's Avatar
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    Armageddon Bikes

    Armageddon Bikes
    The April issue of Cycle World had an article on Amageddon bikes - what will you ride to the end of the world? And then picked five bikes that make little or no sense - unless it really is the end of the world.

    It's a California magazine so the end of the world to them means riding from LA to the desert areas to the east. How it makes sense to ride to a desert is beyond me.

    But their rankings reflected a more realistic bent: "picking one as a survival tool, one that you could depend on in a wide and unknown variety of circumstances."In order of their choices, worst to best:

    Triumph Tiger 800XC
    Husquavarna TR650
    Yamaha Super Tenere
    KTM 990 Adventure
    Kawasaki KLR650

    The only problem is if I was looking at bikes as a survival tool , the answer would be "None of the above"

    First of all, in the Northeast it isn't really practical to have only a motorcycle for transportation. So choosing a bike that is too big and heavy to easily transport doesn't seem practical. The lightest bike they tested weighed 427 lbs.

    Second, taking off someplace on a bike means you are leaving a lot of resources behind, not to mention being vulnerable to almost any kind of attack.

    Finally, the bikes they tested are relatively new and relatively complex.

    Personally, I consider chance of total societal breakdown to be quite remote. Based on reality, the biggest need for emergency transportation would be during a hurricane, snow storm, or other natural disaster. This also means you probably want a bike that is street legal.

    It seems to me that a 250cc (plus or minus 75cc) dirt bike with a headlight would be about the most practical choice. And there, you'd want to pick one that had been in production for many years with little or no change, was light, strong, and had significant fuel range. Whether it was plated or not would depend on your view of what the end of the world really looks like.

    So what is your For Emergency Use Only choice? The usual suspects - turbo 'busa or Supermoto?

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  2. #2
    Lifer jasnmar's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Already answered in Walking Dead...

    I don't know what it is, but it looks like this, and is loud. Loud pipes save lives.
    Armageddon Bikes-daryl-bike1-jpg

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  3. #3
    Lifer Kurlon's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    IIRC that is an ugly CB350 hack job that they always overdubbed with an HD soundtrack.

    For me, I'm thinking Ural Patrol 2wd with my WR250R tied to the rack on back.

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  4. #4
    Super Moderator TheIglu's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    KLR would win in that list out of them.


    I'd go an XR250 or XR400. Stingier on the precious juice, the gasohol. Ural would be fine if you just lived like Armageddon, not actually in it. They tend to break a lot.

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  5. #5
    Super Adventurer SRTie4k's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    I interpret "the Armageddon" to mean either a zombie apocalypse or a nuclear bombing.

    Either way, you need a rugged, lightweight and easy to repair bike. I'd say a KLR650 would probably fit that bill.

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  6. #6
    Lifer PhilB's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Clearly, a Rokon is your only rational option.

    PhilB

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    "A free man must be able to endure it when his fellow men act and live otherwise than he considers proper." -- Ludwig von Mises
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  7. #7
    Lifer Kurlon's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Loves me a Rokon, unless you have to actually travel distance. Those things CRAWL... which is great for difficult terrain, not so great when the going is easy.

    On the Ural front, the newer ones seem to be worlds better than they used to be. If we're talking true Apocalypse vehicle, I'd have one that had already had all of the aftermarket longevity upgrades done. From that point forward, they're dead simple to work on, still carbs and basic CDI, in a pinch easy enough to convert back to points.

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  8. #8
    Lifer BSR6's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    For me it would be a mountain bike.

    As you stated, either way you're leaving yourself vulnerable. A mountain bike is less likely to break down, easier to fix if it does, never runs out of gas, and is much easier to hide/be stealthy with. Sure you can cover more distance and outrun people on a motorcycle, but I would prefer to stay ahead of the game by not showing my presence in the first place. I would wear a pack that includes a hammock tent among other basic essentials. Then I'd drift from place to place finding abandoned shelter, using the tent when I was in a pinch, and learning to live off what is available through utilizing the basic tools I would be able to carry with me.

    If your not going to join a group and be with others who are willing to combine resources, your better off quietly lurking about in a manner that doesn't reveal your presence.

    To stay with the game...I'll assume it HAS to be a motorcycle. In that case the KLR wins hands down for me.

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  9. #9
    Lifer Falko's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    I'd take something fun 'cause with my luck I'd get shot and eaten within two hours of the start anyway....

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  10. #10
    Junior Member Solow89's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    DR350....

    Pretty much in the middle of every category and I've never had a bad one

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  11. #11
    Lifer Chippertheripper's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Can I still have suspension mods after the Armageddon?

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  12. #12

    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Guys, it's the bike you have at the time, but I agree, something with knobby tires would probably be good in the most armageddic situations. but for lane splitting as traffic jams create parking lots on the turnpike, my 650r is gonna rock. fold in the mirrors! ahhg! zombie tsunami!!

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  13. #13

    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by jasnmar View Post
    Already answered in Walking Dead...

    I don't know what it is, but it looks like this, and is loud. Loud pipes save lives.
    Armageddon Bikes-daryl-bike1-jpg
    Triumph

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    -Mark
    80 GS850 well sorta....

  14. #14

    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Cr500!!

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  15. #15
    Lifer Kurlon's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by Mvalenti View Post
    Triumph
    Quick googling claims it's an XS650, so a Triumph clone. I know in the first two seasons they had more than one bike they were using depending on the scene, could have sworn one was a CB350 base.

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  16. #16
    13/f/MA/on period. Garrett's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    A Ural. Those already survived one nuclear fall out :shifty

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    Too many bikes to list
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  17. #17
    Lifer markbvt's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by Garandman View Post
    In order of their choices, worst to best:

    Triumph Tiger 800XC
    Husquavarna TR650
    Yamaha Super Tenere
    KTM 990 Adventure
    Kawasaki KLR650
    That list is worst to best, not best to worst?

    Why would they possibly rank a KTM Adventure over a Tiger? It's a slightly better dirtbike, yes, but it's WAY higher maintenance. It would be a bitch to keep finding new water pumps for it every 15,000 miles after the apocalypse...

    That said, as much as I love my Tiger, I'd have to say that the best apocalypse bike would probably have to be a WR250R. Easy to take nearly anywhere, reliable, gets great gas mileage, and even after the apocalypse it would be easy to find tires for it because practically every motorcycle shop in the universe has knobbies in 21" and 18" sizes, and most would probably still have a few tucked in the back even after everyone's gone.

    --mark

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  18. #18
    is not wearing pants Point37's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    my tw200...

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  19. #19
    Life is good! gadget's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    My choice would depend on the preferences of the dead guy I take it from.
    Since I wont need it until it is too late to buy it.

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    Last edited by gadget; 08-27-13 at 11:46 AM.
    Sam


  20. #20
    Member R8td-R's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    I'd find this place and move in. Armageddon Bikes-1286312637r2xbqz4-jpg
    Now if i need to move around it would be on thisArmageddon Bikes-motopeds-jpg easy to maintain, very light, can reach at least 30mph

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  21. #21
    Life is good! gadget's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes



    I could see someone racing along a dirt track around that tiny island...

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    Sam


  22. #22
    my attitude matches yours GixxerJosh's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by breakdirt916 View Post
    Cr500!!
    Insane bike! Only issue is kicking the sucker over.

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  23. #23
    Day late, dollar short carsick's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by Point37 View Post
    my tw200...
    Beat me to it, I was gonna take a pic of the '87 a customer just brought in for inspection. Had a front rack and windshield too, seemed to fit this thread.

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  24. #24
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    For the Zombie apocalypse. Six row self propelled corn chopper, suck em in, grind em up and spit em out the back.

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  25. #25
    Lifer Garandman's Avatar
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    Re: Armageddon Bikes

    Quote Originally Posted by Point37 View Post
    my tw200...
    You are my new hero, replacing Chipper at the head of my Pantheon of heros.

    I think those bikes are cool, but Im told that 6'2 people with bad knees need not apply.

    Think my vote would be Honda CRF250L. Street legal in case there were still authorities, a lot of mobility if not, simple and perhaps best parts availability.

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    Last edited by Garandman; 08-28-13 at 06:20 AM.

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