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Ok, I have zero miles on it, it's only 26 years old and it's in great shape, but there's a big crack running down the middle of my ass w/ a little hole about 1/2 way down.
It's not gonna blow out on me, is it?
Who do i talk to about warranty? God? My Parents? The doctor that delivered me?
(if ya can't tell, i'm bored at work again )