How do you stay neighborly?

[aldend123]

While I understand and desire diplomacy, I'd struggle with the same problem of how to raise the issue and not come off as a complete dick. And I'd be pissed about it just because respecting your neighbor isn't rocket science and I expect you to try.

If the stuff that's currently there doesn't really bother you and you're just trying to make sure it doesn't get any worse, opening point is "I don't mind about the stuff you've got, but I just want to make sure we're all on the same page that I'd appreciate no more than that". You can hope they'll also get the point and back off with the easily moved stuff and refer to the invisible line more strictly in the future. If you really trust the relationship between the two females, have them talk it out. The catch is that you might end up with some he-said-she-said middleschool BS.

I'd also mow the property line perfectly, and make sure to go around their stuff. Pretty easy for them to see where you're drawing the line in the sand.

[Ducatijocki]

I agree with mzdagrl. Many people are unaware of the actual location of property boundaries. Most property transfers in NH happen without surveys. Not sure what the rule is in CT. The only way to be absolutely sure where the property boundary lies is to get a survey and even then, it's just a highly educated guess by the surveyor. Unless you have a survey, not even you know where the property line is. I'd first make it absolutely certain that you know where it is yourself, then approach your neighbor with care. It would be a shame if you dork up a friendship not over the boundary issue but over your communication style.

[Manik]

MA DOT, AMTRAC, MBCR, CSX, land and bridge surveyor here.... No professional survey work is ever just an "educated guess" ... Not even a "highly educated guess". Math is an exact science. Theres a reason people don't get to argue over boundaries with pointing fingers in court. To say surveyors are guessing is like saying nasa scientists who aim rockets have lucky aim.

[Pigman]

Id rather have you shitty neighbors than mine.....the tool behind me took his 450F quad out in his yard at 3AM and was blowing horror for a good 15min...fun fun

FML

[daviid]

step 1, buy land mines
step 2, ???
step 3, profit

or if you want to go the sneaky route, tell them you were thinking about selling and the surveyor said their shit is on your property and that it needs to be moved

[SteveM]

Just tell them that the issue came up in an appraisal when you were trying to refi and that through this you learned about all the problems that can crop up from it.

Be nice , say please, even apologize if you have to.

Unless they are complete morons, it should be fine, and if they are, you need to move...

[Falko]

Park in their flower bed, see if they get the hint.

I was actually on the other side of the "fence" on something like this. I was mowing about 10' of my neighbors yard as the two just join, no boundary beyond nice grass/field. My neighbor, who never mows, asked if I knew I was mowing their yard. I said yes, it keeps your weeds from progressing into my yard. He said fair enough, and we've never had an issue. So it pays to just be straight forward. Let them know that you are concerned with their stuff on your property due to liability reasons. Simple enough.

[RandyO]

MA DOT, AMTRAC, MBCR, CSX, land and bridge surveyor here.... No professional survey work is ever just an "educated guess" ... Not even a "highly educated guess". Math is an exact science. Theres a reason people don't get to argue over boundaries with pointing fingers in court. To say surveyors are guessing is like saying nasa scientists who aim rockets have lucky aim.

As a licensed professional surveyor for the past 28 years (42 years total in the land surveying industry) I have to disagree

thats all boundary surveying is, educated opinion. the mathematics of boundary surveying is far from absolute, more important are legal itheory, deed interpretations, senior rights.

[RGB500]

Obviously, you need to mention to them that their stuff is on your property. If they ignor it, mail them a certified letter stating it needs to be removed within 7 days or daily storage fees will be charged. If they still ignor it, bust out the saws-all and cut that turd in half right on the property line.

It's your property! You aren't paying a mortgage and tax bill to store Jo-Bob's crap!

[wiggeywackyo]

Obviously, you need to mention to them that their stuff is on your property. If they ignor it, mail them a certified letter stating it needs to be removed within 7 days or daily storage fees will be charged. If they still ignor it, bust out the saws-all and cut that turd in half right on the property line.

It's your property! You aren't paying a mortgage and tax bill to store Jo-Bob's crap!

I like your style.

[gadget]

for Christ's sake, just go talk to them

You should have done that right away instead of letting the resentment build up and turn this molehill into a mountain.

[obsolete]

I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice.

[gtutunjian]

I know but they make a strong point when stapled to one's face.

Assuming people can or want to read Where there's no fence I've seen people mark the line with stones every 5-10 yards. It sends the message and doesn't cost much.

[GearHd6]

for Christ's sake, just go talk to them

You should have done that right away instead of letting the resentment build up and turn this molehill into a mountain.

Easy now... I was trying to play nice with the shed seeing it's only about 4-5 feet on my property. I didn't want to make waves over that but when the camper went about 25' onto it yesterday it started to tick me off. They have a rough idea where the property line is because about 4 years ago they came over asking about cutting a tree down that was close to our property line.

[obsolete]

You weren't playing nice. You weren't playing at all. It ticked you off and you didn't say anything about it, now they do something else and you've added to your anger. They have no idea that you're angry nor that you were being nice by letting them put the shed there. If you go over there with that shit they'll just look at you and think "wow, this asshole's all pissed off for nothing" and they will act accordingly.

[SteveM]

I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice.

How will I know when not to be nice?

[GearHd6]

I never said I was going to go over there with a huge attitude and a shotgun in hand. I was just looking for idea's on how to approach them and not stir up trouble.

And they do know where the property line is, they just seem to ignore it. So they know I was playing nice about the shed. The part that bothers me most is that I need to now go over there and play nice and be all diplomatic because they have no respect and knowingly park their crap on my land.

[jasnmar]

How will I know when not to be nice?

You won't. I'll let you know when it's time not to be nice .

[gadget]

I never said I was going to go over there with a huge attitude and a shotgun in hand. I was just looking for idea's on how to approach them and not stir up trouble.

And they do know where the property line is, they just seem to ignore it. So they know I was playing nice about the shed. The part that bothers me most is that I need to now go over there and play nice and be all diplomatic because they have no respect and knowingly park their crap on my land.

see...you already resent having to go over there...and blame them for not reading your mind...

If you had mentioned something the first time about the shed, you might not be dealing with it now.

Don't make up any bullshit like wanting to put in a fence or anything.

Just go over there and politely say "could you please move your stuff off of my property?"

[GearHd6]

I think most anyone would resent having to go deal with a situation like this. But like I said, it doesn't mean I'm not going to go over there and play nice.

And as you said, I don't plan on going over there and making up stories, I never had.

[wil11748]

Adverse Possession is not easy to prove

Yeah but easements are easier--particularly if there were, say, a forum post by the landowner indicating their awareness of encroachment and that they made no effort to stop it--for instance.

Also, I think some states still use 10 years (Rhode Island comes to mind, but I'm not 100% sure).

[gregp]

Once you do get it resolved, and I have no doubt that you will, you may want to consider fencing at least this portion off, to prevent future encroachments. I would suggest simply mustering up the courage to talk to them about it, and asking them to be more considerate in the future. These things are usually not as bad as they seem - especially if your girlfriend is friends with them. You can be sure that once you have had the conversation, there will be a conversation at their dinner table in which one person will call you an a-hole for bringing it up, and another will stick up for you. In the end, everything will be fine, and the world will continue to turn. IMO, Things like this rarely turn into a Hatfield & McCoy feud, unless you want them to.

[Stoneman]

I guess if you're still a bit uneasy, you could simpy tell 'em your homeowner's holder came to update your policy and he noticed their shit was over on your line. Tell 'em they gotta move it for insurance purposes. THEN staple that other shit to their faces...

[Garandman]

I never said I was going to go over there with a huge attitude and a shotgun in hand. I was just looking for idea's on how to approach them and not stir up trouble.

And they do know where the property line is, they just seem to ignore it. So they know I was playing nice about the shed. The part that bothers me most is that I need to now go over there and play nice and be all diplomatic because they have no respect and knowingly park their crap on my land.

I believe I would have a plot plan in hand.

[butcher bergs]

I'm wondering how others would confront their neighbors in hopes of not pissing them off and causing a war. I mean they're not very concerned about pissing me off it seems. I feel I'm being taken advantage of.

Quit being a pussy and go say something.

I just went through an incident with my idiot neighbor and her two asshole beagles. Couple months ago they got loose and killed a couple chickens another neighbor owns. Long story short, I respectfully told her that, since both dogs have bitten me and now have killed other animals, if either of her dogs are loose and happen upon my property while my daughter is outside, they won't be coming back as she cannot guarantee the safety of my daughter.

Dogs haven't gotten loose since. Problem solved.