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Bad Investment

  1. #1
    Littering and........
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    Jul 2004
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    Bad Investment

    THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST

    What am I doing wrong?

    Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
    (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
    I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
    least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
    that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
    I'm overreaching at all.

    Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
    you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
    200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
    me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
    to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
    I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
    get to her level?

    Here are my questions specifically:

    - Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
    restaurants, gyms

    -What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
    feelings

    -Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

    - Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
    side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
    nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
    gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
    there?

    - Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
    banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
    hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

    - How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
    MARRIAGE ONLY

    Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest
    way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front
    about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't
    able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
    nice home and hearth.

    it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
    interests
    PostingID: 432279810




    THE ANSWER
    Dear Pers-431649184:

    I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
    about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
    Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
    bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I
    see it.

    Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
    crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
    suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
    my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my
    money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
    that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't
    be getting any more beautiful!

    So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
    asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
    accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
    hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
    earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

    So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
    and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
    to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
    you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
    to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
    as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

    Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
    I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
    as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
    believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
    hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

    By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
    we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

    With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
    Classic "pump and dump."
    I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
    lease, let me know.




    --
    Sam Webb, Senior Broker

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  2. #2
    Just Registered Doc's Avatar
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    Jericho, VT
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    Bad Investment


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    "I'd rather ride a slow bike fast than a fast bike slow"
    Bikes: Ducati: 748 (Track) Honda: RC31 (Race/street)/ CRF 110 Mini Moto/ Hawk Endurance Racer Kawasaki: ZXR1200R
    BOMO Instructor
    EX# X

  3. #3
    Littering and........
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    Bad Investment

    Sorry.

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  4. #4
    Lifer richw's Avatar
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    Aug 2004
    Location
    Baltic,CT
    Age
    78
    Posts
    4,482

    Bad Investment

    Would you have sex with me for $100 NO

    how about $1000 -- no

    how about 10,000 ----eeerrr naw

    how about $50,000 cash for a weekend --- yes

    Well we have established what you are now we are just haggling about price

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    Glen Beck is John the Baptist

  5. #5
    Satans Donkey Uncle Snake's Avatar
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    Mar 2005
    Location
    Central VT
    Age
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    Bad Investment

    All I got out of that was that Doc would have sex with Highsider for $10..........

    :tagteam:

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    Jake
    2006 ZX-10R
    1999 Kawasaki ZRX1100

  6. #6
    Just Registered Doc's Avatar
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    Bad Investment

    It's not Ghey if you don't push back..









    Goddamnit! Now they have me doing it...

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    "I'd rather ride a slow bike fast than a fast bike slow"
    Bikes: Ducati: 748 (Track) Honda: RC31 (Race/street)/ CRF 110 Mini Moto/ Hawk Endurance Racer Kawasaki: ZXR1200R
    BOMO Instructor
    EX# X

  7. #7
    Lifer RyanNicholson's Avatar
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    Canterbury, NH
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    Bad Investment

    haha thats pretty funny...never read that before

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  8. #8
    Just Registered The Crashing Tomato's Avatar
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    ---------------------------------------------------
    Originally Posted by hammadown .....
    The rule is:
    If even Zip Tie Alley says, "no you shouldn't use a zip tie on that" you REALLLLLLY shouldn't use a zip tie on that! lol

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