funny

[skiierx]

A husband found himself in big trouble when he forgot his wedding
anniversary.
His wife angrily told him, "Tomorrow there better be something for me
in the driveway that goes from zero t o 160 in five seconds or less."

The next morning, the wife found a small package in the driveway. She
opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Visiting hours for the husband at the hospital are limited due to the
extent of the injuries...

[ZX-12R]

[rjh200]

A man and his wife were driving home one very cold night when the wife
asks her husband to stop the car. There was a baby skunk lying at the
side of the road, and she got out to see if it was still alive. It was,
and she said to her husband, "It's nearly frozen to death. Can we take
it with us, get it warm, and let it go in the morning?"
He says, "O.K., Get in the car with it."
"Where shall I put it to get it warm?"
He says, "Put it in between your legs. It's nice and warm there.
"But what about the smell?"
"Just hold its nose."
The man is expected to recover,
but the skunk she used to beat him with died at the scene.

[Half Squid]

[Josephd14]