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Washington DC has posted a new terrorist alert to all of the East Coast.
Citizens of America we are under attack by a terrorist cell known as MNW or more commonly known as Mother Natures Wrath. MNW has been credited with numerous attacks around the world.
A Biochemical agent has already been released in the South and heading up the Eastern Seaboard to New England.
The Biochemical has been analyzed by the top scientists in the country, Millions of dollars have been spent for your safety.
The following conclusions have been made by the leading speacialist in the field of Biochemical Warfare Dr. Iajuanna B. Phuckedup " The major chemical irratant is H2O, in a frozen state it can cause havoc on the population".
The Homeland Security Dept. has already assessed the situation and has a new release for the public as follows:
Leave your Home Depots and Hardware stores immediately, drop the duct tape and plastic sheeting and proceed directly to a Grocery store where upon go directly to the dairy and bakery depts. and buy as much milk and bread that you can,what type is up to you, the public, but here are some guide lines.
White bread, wheat bread, whole grain even raisin bread is acceptable. Whole milk ,skim milk ,2% and even chocolate milk but not Soy we repeat NOT SOY.Remain calm and go straight home and wait for further instructions.
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